Things that have happened since the White Sox last made the playoffs

World Events

The entire Obama presidency.

Two new supreme court justices.

Gordon Beckham’s entire MLB career (RIP).

Spotify was first launched during the 2008 ALDS.

Twitter has gone from 300,000 tweets per day to 500,000,000.

South Sudan became a new country.

The Syrian Civil War began and has been estimated to have cost as many as 300,000 lives.

The iPad was invented, Steve Jobs died, and they will have released the Steve Jobs biography movie prior to the beginning of next season. And they already released a real bad one made with Ashton Kutcher and a case of fake beards.

Sports

As the Sox cannot make the playoffs until October 2016 at the soonest, there will have been three summer Olympics in the interim.

The Blackhawks have won three, non-consecutive Stanley Cups.

Jay Cutler started for the Chicago Bears in a playoff victory.

Frank Thomas retired after the 2008 season, waited the requisite five years, was elected into the Hall of Fame on the first ballot,  and yet another class of Hall of Famers has been voted in since then.

Ozzie Guillen managed for three more seasons, was then traded to the Marlins where he managed for a season and then was fired. Think of how long Ozzie has been out of a managing job. That time comprises less than half of this playoff drought.

Of the main Starting Nine for the 2008 team, the following players have since retired: Paul Konerko, Jermaine Dye, Orlando Cabrera, Joe Crede, Carlos Quentin, Jim Thome. Only 3/9 starters remain in baseball - Pierzynski, Alexei, and Swisher. Jose Contreras and Javier Vazquez have also retired.

Michael Taylor was traded for Roy Halladay as a minor leaguer in 2009. He retired this spring.

Brian Anderson switched from hitting to pitching to hitting again and hasn’t played in pro ball since 2012 as far as I can tell. He will subbing in for Steve Stone in the broadcast booth later this month.

If current standings hold, every other team but the Mariners, Padres and Marlins will have made the playoffs.

James

Completed two degrees, worked for two years between them.

On my third car, not by choice, but because two cars have lived and fully died.

Starting dating my wife of a year and a half during the stretch run of ‘08. We had a very long courtship.

Moved out of my parents’ house and lived in three different apartments.

Began blogging about the White Sox. Started writing anything that wasn’t comedy sketches.

Nick

Like James, completed two degrees, moved away from home into several different apartments.

Passed the bar exam and admitted to the bar.

Ethan

Graduated Middle School

Graduated High School

Taken each of the following math classes: Geometry, Algebra 2, pre-calculus, calculus 1, calculus 2, calculus 3, linear algebra, single variate calculus theory, numerical analysis

Have spent over a month thinking I would pursue each of the following academically: journalism, physics, engineering, statistics, mathematics

Grown 4 inches and gained 60 pounds

Worked the first 3 jobs of my life

Had my braces removed

Got my learner’s permit

Got my license

Got in my first accident

Became a legal adult

Voted for the first time (but not yet in a presidential election)

Lived all but the first 5 months of my teenage life

Lived over 30% of my life